My husband is the 2nd son-in-law for my Mother. My sister married years before me and later migrated to Australia. Its not unusual for Mom to visit her up to 2 months at a time. Normal life there would be cooking, cleaning, baby-sitting and of course vacationing. Its her nature to help out her daughters whenever she can. She does it all the time when in Bangkok too.
One thing I recall clearly about my Mother, she never had any expectations of the son-in-laws. She never complains that they don't do this or that for her. She is a very contented Mother-in-law.
There was a point in time when I visited her during weekdays, hubby would still be at work. The children and I will spend a few hours at her home, either having a home-cooked lunch or tea. The purpose was just to hang-out together. I will return home before 5pm to escape the rush hour traffic. As a result, for that period of few years, my husband never visited my parents at their home. It was just the children and me. My Mother never complained. But instead she makes the effort to visit us.
She loves to cook for her son-in-laws. My brother-in-law's favorite dessert is pineapple tarts and she knows that. Its amazing the efforts she makes to prepare these tarts for both him and my hubby, who happens to enjoy it as well. Last year, she made 'chang'. Glutinous rice wrapped in leaves. It was a LOT of work and she spent the whole day cooking. Needless to say, hubby enjoyed it tremendously.
Whenever she visits, she will try to prepare the foods which my hubby enjoys. I often take that for granted but its her way of caring for him. I take a break from cooking when Mom is around.
Whenever she comes over to my place in Malaysia or Bangkok, she is often very low profile. She doesn't talk a lot to my husband because she understands that he is not the "talkative type". So, she will usually creep into her room while she allows us 'family time' when my husband returns from work. Her presence does not demand attention. She is satisfied by "just being there". Not overwhelming.
Since I have such a good example of being a good Mother-in-law, I am sure I won't go wrong. Hopefully.
One thing I recall clearly about my Mother, she never had any expectations of the son-in-laws. She never complains that they don't do this or that for her. She is a very contented Mother-in-law.
There was a point in time when I visited her during weekdays, hubby would still be at work. The children and I will spend a few hours at her home, either having a home-cooked lunch or tea. The purpose was just to hang-out together. I will return home before 5pm to escape the rush hour traffic. As a result, for that period of few years, my husband never visited my parents at their home. It was just the children and me. My Mother never complained. But instead she makes the effort to visit us.
She loves to cook for her son-in-laws. My brother-in-law's favorite dessert is pineapple tarts and she knows that. Its amazing the efforts she makes to prepare these tarts for both him and my hubby, who happens to enjoy it as well. Last year, she made 'chang'. Glutinous rice wrapped in leaves. It was a LOT of work and she spent the whole day cooking. Needless to say, hubby enjoyed it tremendously.
Whenever she visits, she will try to prepare the foods which my hubby enjoys. I often take that for granted but its her way of caring for him. I take a break from cooking when Mom is around.
Whenever she comes over to my place in Malaysia or Bangkok, she is often very low profile. She doesn't talk a lot to my husband because she understands that he is not the "talkative type". So, she will usually creep into her room while she allows us 'family time' when my husband returns from work. Her presence does not demand attention. She is satisfied by "just being there". Not overwhelming.
Since I have such a good example of being a good Mother-in-law, I am sure I won't go wrong. Hopefully.
4 comments:
In most cases, relationships between a
1. mil and son-in-law and
2. mil and daughter-in-law
are 2 different scenarios, ain't they?
It's universal law, though there might be some exceptional cases.
Mine goes with the flow.
You are right. Wish life could be simpler.
It sounds like you do have good examples - very good - you are very lucky. You will be a good MIL - I am sure.
Have a good day - Kellan
Kellan,
You are so kind. Its not easy but God can help, eh?
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